MOO U News: Clemson “defeats” Carolina 1 game to 2 in weekend series. Leggett leads wild celebration!

THIS IS A "FAKE" STORY - DO NOT TAKE IT TOO SERIOUS!

AUTHOR: RUSTY CRANKSHAFT --

In his proudest moment as a baseball coach, Jack Leggett led his Clemson baseball team in a chaotic and wild celebration, including the singing of “We are the Champions” at Doug Kingsmore Stadium on Sunday afternoon.  His Tigers had managed to salvage a lone victory in the 3-game weekend set, and in his mind since it was the last one played that meant the Tigers won.  “We have shown the entire state and the world that we are better than Carolina now, and that’s all that matters.  Some people would rather have 2 wins as opposed to 1, but not me.  1 is more than 2 every time it’s counted in my mind.” 

Leggett and his players dogpiled on the field after the game on Sunday, and he planned to drive as far as needed to get a tattoo of the score etched on his rear end.  “This is the high point for me as a Coach, no doubt.  The record books will show that the last time our teams took the field we won.  That means Ray Tanner wants no part of coaching against me.  Period!  Tweet that!” 

The Gamecock players were stunned and confused as they watched Clemson celebrate.  Christian Walker summed it up by saying, “We had never heard of a team losing 2 of 3 to someone and still dogpiling on the field.  That was new to us, and we admit that.  But I do have to admit that Richie Shaffer has a sweet voice just like Freddie Mercury.”

Clemson Athletics Director Terry Don Joe Bob Billy Cooter Phillips Head Screwdriver, realizing how stupid the celebration was, and how poorly it would be perceived nationally, immediately went into spin and damage control.  “Coach Leggett’s actions today were quite unusual, and caused by a very tight necktie at church.  Also, he had a second cup of coffee at breakfast and was hearing voices again.  No big deal.”