Friday, November 9, 2012

Crystal Ball - Week 11

Missouri at Tennessee
The Columbia West Ocelots will prowl into the hills this weekend, hoping to skin up Old Smoky before his afternoon nap.  The Knoxville Mountain Troopers will have their rifles ready, but their aim has been in question all season.  Derek Dooley may not be the general of the brigade much longer if their shooting doesn’t improve quickly.   
The Cock-A-Booster Crystal ball says...Tennessee by 5

Louisiana-Lafayette at Florida
The Pigskin Lizards from the Gainesville Bog will be swimming in earnest on Saturday, and their hoping some red-hot Gumbo from the Bayou.  The Visitors from the Backwater know how to throw a tantrum and they’ll come in angry, but that will only add some spice to the Crocodiles’ meal.  Will Muschamp’s face will be red because of the food instead of a fit for a change.           
The Cock-A-Booster Crystal ball says...Florida by 16

Texas A & M at Alabama
Nick Saban and the Elegant Elephants will open up the Tuscaloosa Feeding Grounds this weekend, and they plan to trample up some Cowboys from College Station for some gridiron exercise.  The visiting calf-ropers will bring some shiny lassos with them when they arrive, and they think they’ll snag some ivory for a souvenir.  It’s tough to drag a Pachyderm anywhere near Houston.    
The Cock-A-Booster Crystal ball says...Alabama by 9

Georgia at Auburn
The propped up puppies from East Georgia leave their flea-ridden water dish this weekend, hoping to hike their legs on Jordan-Hare while the local felines are wounded.  Gene Chizik is about to be declawed if he’s not careful, and his Plains Lions better be ready to roar.  If Mark Richt can avoid a neutering during the visit, his barkers will get an unearned trip to Atlanta. 
The Cock-A-Booster Crystal ball says...Georgia by 7

Miss. State at LSU
The Bayou Bengals saw their dreams die at Death Valley last week, so look for them to be a little flat when some drooling barkers rumble in from Magnolia Country.  The Starkville K9s will be ready to bury the Mad Hatter, but he will have the home den in a frenzy by kickoff.  Tough to be that high on catnip two Saturdays in a row.
The Cock-A-Booster Crystal ball says...Miss. State by 3 in a mild upset

Maryland at Clemson
Dabo Swinney and his Heisman Orangies open up the Pickens County Scratching Post this weekend, ready to cook up a pot of turtle stew for a weekend treat.  The ancient crawlers have six shells left on the roster, so it won’t be long before they are part of the recipe.  The Meow Mix should be full of bourbon at the Esso Club when this one is done.      
The Cock-A-Booster Crystal ball says...Clesmson by 46

Arkansas at South Carolina
The Richland County Rooster Farm will be open for business on Saturday, and Steve Spurrier is planning to serve up some Ozark BBQ as an afternoon treat.  The Fayetteville Oinkers have had dented snouts all year, but they usually enjoy giving these Poultries a plucking.  It will be a tight affair for a while, but Pork is what’s for dinner when the day is done. 
The Cock-A-Booster Crystal ball says...South Carolina by 16

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