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Cock-A-Booster: It is my pleasure to welcome in legendary former Gamecock Coach Lou Holtz to preview the upcoming rivalry game between Carolina and Clemson. How you doing Coach?
Lou: That is personal Ted and I would appreciate you minding your own business.
Cock-A-Booster: Coach, you were involved in many rivalries over the years. How does Carolina-Clemson rank in your mind?
Lou: The University of Clemzon was always “rank.” So much so I had to wear a filter over my nose to handle the odor. You know that methane can be used for fuel now.
Cock-A-Booster: No, Coach I mean do you think the rivalry gets overheated sometimes?
Lou: Well, Ted this is the Deep South. You looking for penguins or something?
Cock-A-Booster: Coach, who wins this year’s game, the Gamecocks or the Tigers?
Lou: Well the real winners are always the good folks at Carolina Pride Hot Dogs. Every bite is a touchdown strike with The Pride.
Cock-A-Booster: Okay Coach but which team will score more points next week?
Lou: Notre Dame.
Cock-A-Booster: Out of Carolina and Clemson Coach?
Lou: I don’t think either one of them is playing Notre Dame. You really should do some research.
Cock-A-Booster: Coach is there anything you would like to say about the Gamecocks and Tigers.
Lou: Mark May is an idiot. Just a true moron. That’s all I have to say about that.
Cock-A-Booster: That’s all the time we have today. Join us next time when Coach Holtz will preview the bowl games and preview SEC basketball.
Lou: They play basketball in the SEC?
Hysterical!!
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